You, Sir, Are No Gentleman

Buffy Gentlemen

It sure seems like the word “gentleman” is getting thrown around a lot these days. Originally used to describe landed men of impeccable breeding, background and manners, it morphed slowly into a description of any considerate, kind, male-gendered person. To which we say, huzzah!

However, in a most astounding turnabout, the word “gentleman” has someone now become (at least in America) a word primarily used in the description of airport-adjacent strip clubs. Um. Huzzah? Sure, in the 20th century you got the vote, ladies, but they got the word “gentleman” and attached it to The Landing Strip, just off Route 17. So maybe let’s call it a draw.

Hey, and speaking of gentlemen…!

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The Worst Way To Party Like A Rock Star

William Shatner on a Horse

Let us, for just a moment, talk once again about the qualities of a rock star.

Rock stars are…

Talented? Occasionally.
Alcohol (ab)users? Often.
Eating disordered? Often.
Raging narcissists? Often.
Drug (ab)users? Often.
Promiscuous? Often.
Excellent providers of high-quality childcare services? Emphatically not.

And yet…

Nanny Rock Stars
First of all, please, for the love of God, get a handle on your comma usage. This ad reads like it was dictated by a hiccuping William Shatner while he rode a horse sidesaddle.

Secondly, starting any sentence “Think about it,” is just obnoxious. The ‘thinking about it’ will generally follow the ‘reading about it’. No need to make a special thinking request. Think about it.

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May You Live In Interesting Times

Thanks to Avoid This Job reader Jessica, we have new sadness to add to our The Kids Are Not Alright category:

Let’s cut right to the chase here:

WHAT IN THE HELL DOES “INTERESTING COMPENSATION” MEAN?

Are you actually trying to sound like a molestation factory? Or the front for a child slavery ring? Because it doesn’t sound good. At all. Phrases like “the shooting last about three hours” are not helping.

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If Your Child Makes It To 18, It Will Be A Miracle

Nervous Baby

Nervous BabyTimes are tough everywhere, and many of us are cutting back on the little luxuries. Things like going to the movies, eating out, cable TV, you know, just, whatever….ensuring the health and safety of our offspring, etc, etc, etc.

Oh. Wait.

You are looking for someone to care for your infant more than full-time. Let’s review the terms.

45 hrs/week
$350/month
Average
4.2 weeks/month

That works out to $1.85/hr. That is surprising! And insane.

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