Wanted:spell Check,strunk,white.

The inappropriate capitalization and deeply claustrophobic punctuation of the subject line is a great way to start this job post, striking just the right note of ‘unprofessional, with a hint of crazy’.

 

1) When you say “not a strip club” you actually mean “more of a creepy sex club for weirdos,” right? Cool. Just wanted to make sure we were on the same page.

2) Um… really? You want a combo masseuse/server/host at your “privet” social club? Bad idea, job poster.

  • Things nobody wants a masseuse doing: handling food and beverages.
  • Things nobody wants a creepy sex club worker doing: handling food and beverages.

3) You know what is ALSO a bad idea? Séances of humor.  Sure, sure, it starts out fun… laughing at the dearly departed, good-naturedly mocking the undead, enjoying a good old-fashioned Ghost Roast… when suddenly… SOMEONE HAS THEIR SOUL RIPPED APART BY DEMONS. Those guys never get the joke….

Hyper-hygienic masseuses with happy ending, haunting AND hostessing experience… feel free to apply. Everyone else: avoid this job.

Seance

 

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9 Responses to Wanted:spell Check,strunk,white.

  1. Amy says:

    Hilarious!! I burst out laughing when I read “seance of humor” in the ad.
    Love the site; keep up the great work – your posts always give me a great laugh!

  2. Herbelem says:

    Oh, Avoid This Job, you make my day yet again. The photo and speech blurbs are too much, really. Thanks for being so awesome.

  3. Mindy says:

    I’m glad I wasn’t drinking coffee when I read “seance of humor” or when I saw your pic. My laptop would have suffered. I enjoy Avoid this Job so much.

  4. Lea says:

    I love Avoid This Job.

  5. Gino says:

    Fantastic! The pictures are becoming a key piece to this winning formula! More please!

  6. Danielle says:

    When I read seance of humor, I couldn’t wait until I got to the part where you wrote about it. The picture was golden. Hahaha…oh dear.

  7. L says:

    Well, clearly, a “privet” social club involves shrubbery–sounds perfect!

  8. ssfgg says:

    I LOVE YOU!

  9. ArmyDoc says:

    Also, “privet” is informal Russian for “hello”. It’s obviously a friendly greeting club!

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