A Job To Die For

This is one of those rare ads where the misspellings are so egregious, the grammar so profoundly disturbed, the typos so prevalent, it feels almost like art.

Creepy Craigslist Post

Things Smart People Avoid:

  • Rabid animals
  • Trader Joe’s parking lots
  • Pyramid schemes
  • The comedy of Jeff Dunham
  • This job. And frankly, ANY job posting that contains an answer to the unasked question, “Hey, are you planning to murder the people who apply to this ad?” NO, IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT THE ANSWER IS. Either way: that’s a┬ádealbreaker, ladies.

And sure, it’s also great to know that the models will get to keep any “adult toys” they demonstrate. Very generous. But… as a general rule, let’s just go ahead and say that if at any point during any job, you have an inanimate object INSIDE YOU, it automatically becomes yours. Take it home. Please. And let us never speak of it again.

In the meantime: avoid this job.

Liz Lemon Book


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5 Responses to A Job To Die For

  1. dee says:

    Liz Lemon FTW!

  2. Ashley says:

    The best part is “I don’t have time to kill people.” That is the only reason holding people back from killing other people?

  3. AvoidThisJob says:

    Hahaha, excellent point. If he worked on his time management skills he could be out a-murderin’ all the time!

  4. Likes Dunham says:

    What’s wrong with Jeff Dunham? I find him quite funny and the fact that he is politically incorrect is one of the main reasons.

  5. Rhomanji says:

    OMF. A friggin Men. I hate Jeff Dunham. I thought the whole world had gone mad when I saw that he was getting another special.

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